As the President of the United States for eight years, Barack Obama had one of the toughest jobs in the world. But behind the scenes, he and Michelle faced an even bigger challenge: raising two young girls!
At 22 and 19 years old respectively, Malia and Sasha are all grown up now. And as they got older, Barack and Michelle had to prepare them for a different kind of adulthood. Because they were children of famous parents, every move these girls made would be seriously scrutinized, especially when it came to love and relationships.
Fortunately, Barack and Michelle Obama gave some great advice to their daughters. And here are some of their wise words that we all can learn from!
Don’t end up in the tabloids
Despite the complexities of their lives, Barack and Michelle’s advice was usually simple and direct. For example, as Page Six itself reports, Michelle revealed the advice she gave to Malia before she went off to Harvard at a Klick Health’s Muse event in February 2018: “Don’t wind up on Page Six.” Because the eyes of the world were on her daughters, the last thing Michelle wanted was for them to end up in the tabloids.
However, Michelle added, “I don’t know if she managed that.” That’s because Page Six often featured Malia having an awesome time while living in New York City. And other publications extensively covered everything from her alleged smoking of marijuana to her blooming romance with Rory Farquharson.
RELATED: Moments the Obama Sisters Probably Wish Were Never Caught On Camera
Avoid toxic masculinity
Speaking of Rory, he certainly fits the description of traditional masculinity. He’s tall, handsome, and even played rugby back in high school. While Malia certainly seems to love her time with Rory, their relationship may be another example of her not listening to the advice of her parents.
In this case, the parental advice came from Barack Obama. As The Hill reports, Barack offered his thoughts on masculinity on Bruce Springsteen’s podcast. “I talk to my daughters’ friends about boys growing up”, he said. “So much of popular culture tells [boys] that the only clear, defining thing about being a man, being masculine, is you excel in sports and sexual conquest.”
This is not necessarily a dig at Rory himself. Rather, Barack Obama seems to want his daughters to look for more in the men they date and to not settle for pop-culture stereotypes.
Date a winner
Barack Obama famously loves playing basketball. Interestingly, though, it’s actually Michelle Obama that channels the basketball court when it comes to advice for her daughters.
As ET Online reports, Michelle dished about the qualities women should look for in a man on her podcast. And it all came down to a prolonged basketball metaphor. “Because if you’re looking at a team, the people you want to win with, then number one you want everybody on your team to be strong,” she said.
Continuing, Michelle said, “You don’t want any weak links, you don’t want somebody that you can dominate, you don’t want somebody who’s kind of a loser, right. And also, if you’re on a team, you’ve got to be able to do everything, especially in basketball, it’s like, you would never pick somebody that says, ‘I only dribble. I don’t shoot, I don’t defend, I just dribble.'”
Summing it all up, Michelle put it this way: “If we looked at marriage as a real team, you want your teammate to be a winner. You want LeBron, you know?”
Here’s hoping that Rory proves himself as Malia’s very own MVP!
RELATED: How Serious Is Malia Obama’s Relationship With Rory Farquharson?
Be your own advocate
Not all of Michelle Obama’s relationship advice comes in the form of extended metaphors. Sometimes, she likes to keep things short and sweet.
For example, on an episode of Good Morning America, Michelle offered two short and powerful pieces of advice. First of all, she wants her daughters to understand that “who they are right now is enough.” And second of all, she wants them to exercise “the power of their voices,” something she encouraged “very early on.”
Taken together, this advice makes a lot of sense: Michelle doesn’t want her daughters to think they must change themselves to attract or keep a man. And if someone is trying to force them to change or do anything else they are uncomfortable with, Michelle wants her daughters to be strong advocates for themselves.
Date a man who respects you
One of Barack Obama’s greatest skills was breaking complex ideas down in a way that we could all understand. And he used this skill to give his daughters some advice that will never go out of style.
As Essence reports, Barack once told Steve Harvey about the simple advice he gave his daughters. “What I’ve told them before is, as long as that young man is showing you respect, and is kind to you, then I’m not going to be hovering over every second.”
Sure, this isn’t groundbreaking advice. But when it comes to relationships, finding someone who both cares for you and respects you may be the best advice of all!