If it seems that Christmas music has started playing this year earlier than ever, you’re not wrong. Some stores have been decking their halls since mid October, and let’s not talk about Hallmark revealing their new ornaments back in July. But at least you can rest assured that the classic carols will get overplayed, the younger stars will crank out new standards, and it will all be over by January…
Until you take a listen to these absolute brain melters of Christmas tunes. We’re not talking “Christmas Shoes,” or Justin Bieber’s “Mistletoe,” or how creepy “Baby It’s Cold Outside” seems now. We’re talking bona fide talented entertainers who made a terrible, terrible mistake in the name of some extra holiday earnings. Here are Christmas songs so bizarre you won’t believe they actually exist.
Lady Gaga: “Christmas Tree” – 2008
She’s a top notch performer and her songs are catchy but whoever persuaded her that the lyrics “My Christmas tree is delicious,” “Take off my stockings,” and “Light me up, put me on top” were good choices needs to be given a truckload of coal. Combine that with the dental drill-like synth beat and you have a recipe for disaster. There’s no official video for the release, which is just as well; pictures could not do justice to the song itself: